Why the Story You Tell About Yourself Shapes Your Reality
- creativeexpress3esso
- Jun 25
- 3 min read
Because the stories we repeat to ourselves aren't just thoughts. They're instructions to our nervous system—basically blueprints for our behavior and the scripts we follow every day without even realizing it.
So if you say, “I’m not good with money,” your brain is listening. It’s going to take that story, file it under “truth,” and begin to scan your environment for evidence to support it.
And that is actually neuroscience.
In storytelling—and in your life—there’s always a starting point. In the Hero’s Journey, it’s called The Ordinary World, which is the role you’ve been playing unconsciously.
So it might sound like:
“I never follow through.”
“I attract emotionally unavailable partners.”
These aren’t just complaints or personality quirks. They're identity-level narratives. And because your subconscious mind is wired to stay consistent with your identity, these stories shape your decisions, your relationships, and even your posture, tone of voice, and level of risk tolerance.
Your Brain Is Built to Filter Information
The anterior cingulate cortex (ACC) plays a big role here. It functions like your brain’s internal contradiction detector. So when you say, “I’m successful,” but deep down you don’t believe it, your ACC lights up like an error message: “That doesn’t match what we know.”
But here’s the good news: the ACC is trainable.
If you’re doing tools like EFT tapping, hypnosis, or any kind of emotional alignment work, you can actually teach your brain to stop flagging the new story as false—and start accepting it as your truth.
That’s really where the magic happens.
"I Am" Is a Command
Think of “I am” the same way you’d think of “Open Sesame.” We often underestimate the power of language, but in subconscious work, “I am” truly functions like a command.
If you say:
“I’m anxious.”
“I’m unlovable.”
“I’m always behind.”
Your nervous system receives it like a code. Your body responds, your mood shifts, and your mind starts scanning for more data to confirm it.
That’s why rewriting your story isn’t just about thinking positively. It’s about choosing new, believable identity statements—and practicing them until they feel natural, embodied, and true.
So How Do You Begin to Rewrite?
Step 1: Notice the script.What are the quiet background thoughts that run when something goes wrong?If you’re saying things like:
“Of course this happened to me.”
“I should have known better.”
“This always happens.”
Write them down. These are your default storylines.
Step 2: Name the role.Who have you been cast as in your own life story?The black sheep?The almost-but-never-quite?
Naming the role gives you the power to change it.
Step 3: Interrupt the old frequency.Use EFT, breathwork, or somatic movement. Shift the energy.
Step 4: Try identity statements that are affirming.Say things like:
“I am learning to trust myself.”
“I am building healthy habits.”
“I am becoming someone who chooses peace.”
When you change your story, you begin to change your life—not just in your mind, but in your nervous system, your decisions, your habits, and your energy.
And you’re not pretending to be someone else.You’re remembering who you were before the old story took over.
If you want help, I’m Gina Gold, a transformational coach and I'd love to work with you. And we'd love to have you in our free meetup: Story Gold Circle.
Comments